Tutoring Lisa* – 2.2 – Puzzled

Lisa* was in a great mood today. That made me happy right off the bat!

After reviewing last week’s homework, we pulled out the goals sheet again. Lisa groaned. I reminded her we needed to write down two more goals. Last week, she decided her first goal was to bake a cake. After some heavy thinking, she came up with two others: read a book at the library and do a crossword puzzle.

This last one excited me because last week I’d pulled out a simple crossword puzzle, with the words listed at the top and some letters filled in on the puzzle, and her eyes lit up. Today, I pulled out the puzzle and she got to work. She did a great job and finished it in no time! I think puzzles will add another element of fun to our lessons.

* Name changed to protect the student’s identity.

Tutoring Lisa* – 2.1

Our first day of our second series of sessions started out with a fizzle and ended with a sizzle. As usual, when I arrived, I peeked into the computer room to see if Lisa* was there. She was. “Hi, Lisa.” She didn’t look up from her notebook, but did mumble a greeting. Because she didn’t look up, I followed up with, “Are you doing okay?” Again, she didn’t look up, but responded affirmatively. I was flabbergasted at her behavior. “You can’t look up at me? You’re being rude.” She looked up defiantly and said, “Yes, I’m fine.”

Does Literacy Advance offer training in social skills? I know someone who needs it. There is an interesting pattern to her behavior: sullen upon arrival and cheerful when leaving. I imagine she must have a great deal of stress at home, but please don’t take it out on me. I guess I can at least take comfort in the fact that she leaves feeling good.

Let’s move on. Our agenda included a discussion of goals for this next twelve weeks. I reminded her that we successfully met our goals last time in the first six weeks, so we were on a roll. I asked her what she wanted to focus on this time. She thought for a while and said she didn’t know. I asked her to think about it and we’d firm up the goals next week. I was fully prepared to offer ideas next week if needed, but I really wanted her to think about her goals with no prompting from me. I wanted it to come from her heart.

We were going through our phonics lesson, working on “G” and “J”, when all of a sudden Lisa opened her notebook, whipped out the goals worksheet and began writing. I was thrilled. Goal 1: Make a cake. We figured out the steps together. Step 1: Find a recipe. Step 2: Read and understand the recipe. Step 3: Bake the cake!

This made my day because last week we’d talked briefly about cooking and I offered to bring her a recipe for a chicken dish. I knew from comments that her cooking skills were limited and it makes sense. If you can’t read, how can you read instructions on recipes and packages? Let’s not even mention that grocery shopping must be difficult.

We began going through my chicken dish recipe, that is full of vegetables, and I was amazed at how many words she knew. What she didn’t know was “1/2”, “1/4”, “c.”, “Tbsp” and “tsp.” She also didn’t know what some ingredients were and said her boyfriend would get them for her. We went over the fractions and abbreviations several times and I must say, even though it’s a simple recipe, I am a little worried about the outcome.

I asked her what recipe she wanted next: chicken fried rice. That’s easy. I already have a seasoning packet for that and the directions are fairly simple. We’ll go over that next week and I’ll give her the packet to get her started. Working with recipes is great reading practice with real-life applications. Can’t wait to see what she dishes up for me next week.

* Name changed to protect the student’s identity.

Tutoring Lisa* – Final Week

Today was my final day tutoring Lisa*. What an experience it’s been! I’ve had my ups and downs but this has been an amazingly wonderful time. Both Lisa and I had two decisions to make today: Did we want to continue with Literacy Advance and did we want to continue with each other. I definitely wanted to continue with Literacy Advance and was going to let Lisa make the decision on whether or not to continue with me or with someone new. I asked Lisa if she wanted to continue learning how to read at Literacy Advance. She answered yes. I asked her if she wanted to continue with me as her tutor or work with someone new. Her answer? “I guess with you.” How’s that for rousing support!

Next week, we’ll set new goals. I have some ideas on how to make the learning even more fun and interesting and look forward to trying them out. Today, Lisa said, “Stop making me laugh. I can’t write when I’m laughing!” Perhaps we shouldn’t have too much fun. Not a chance!

* Name changed to protect the student’s identity.

Lock Down

My sister-in-law asked me if I wanted to surprise my youngest nephew, Aidan. Of course, I said yes! She was scheduled to read to his first grade class and I would be going in her place. I hadn’t been in an elementary school classroom in a very long time. Probably since I was in elementary school and that was a long, long time ago. Boy things have changed! For one thing, it’s a much smaller place than I remembered.

When I arrived, the receptionist scanned my driver’s license and I was given a “reading mom” badge with my photo on it. I made my way to the classroom, located in a set of portable buildings, and waited outside the locked door. After a few minutes, the teacher and children came walking up single file, and the look on Aidan’s face when he spotted me was pure surprise. His eyes got wide and he got a huge grin on his face. Priceless!

I introduced myself to the teacher, and was ceremoniously escorted to a small chair in the reading corner. Because I was Aidan’s guest, he got to sit in the chair next to me and introduce me to his class. The teacher asked him who I was and he said “Jenny.” She asked how he knew me and he didn’t answer, so I whispered to him, “I’m your aunt.” His response? “I know that!” The teacher said, “Well, tell the class how you know Jenny.” He quickly mumbled, “She’s my aunt.”

My sister-in-law had given me several books that Aidan had carefully chosen the night before and Aidan helped me select the first book to read. I began reading “If I Built a Car” and thoroughly enjoyed it. Rhyming books are fun and easy to read and the pictures were great. Then I read another book about a lion that I wasn’t so crazy about; probably because it didn’t rhyme.

Reading time was over and the teacher began to instruct them on what would be happening next. They would be going to the playground, as they usually do after reading time, but when they returned to the classroom, they would be doing something new.

The entire school would be participating in a lock down drill. When the drill began, the students would all move to the back of the classroom and sit in a corner. It was important for them to be very quiet. The door would remain locked, the lights would be out and the window blinds closed. They would pretend someone was trying to get into the locked door. She reminded them again that it was important to be very quiet. She said it was a little like the disaster drill they’d done in the past.

Things have changed since I was in a school and it seems that children live in a more dangerous world that I did growing up. Schools are much more safety conscious these days, keeping all the doors locked – in the classrooms and the entrances to the school. The lock down drill sounded a little scary to me, but with all the bad things happening in the world today, it’s better to be safe than sorry.

Tutoring Lisa* – Week Thirteen

I’ve noticed a pattern over the past dozen or so weeks. Each time we meet, Lisa* is sullen. She has a frown on her face, she’s incommunicative and borderline rude. Since I refuse to let her bring my mood down, I force her to interact with me. I ask about her weekend. I ask about her children. I try to pull something other than monosyllabic answers out of her, but it rarely works. As we move along through the lessons, she usually brightens up.

Today, we took several steps back to learning the fundamentals of phonics and began working on the letter B. We looked at a picture and her job was to tell me a story about what she saw and then write down words that began with B using what she saw in the picture. Not surprisingly, she refused to tell me a story and we moved on to writing down words. As she began writing down words, bits and pieces of a story emerged. She was talking! By the end of the session, she was laughing and enjoying herself.

It’s always the same. She comes in sullen and leaves smiling. I know she has a difficult life and I can’t even begin to understand the stress she lives under. It’s clear our time together lightens her load. So even though her behavior is frustrating at times, I know it’s temporary. I really do want to make a difference in Lisa’s life.

* Name changed to protect the student’s identity.

Tutoring Lisa* – Musings

As we get closer to the end of the program, I’m conflicted over whether or not I want to continue teaching Lisa* or begin teaching someone else. Of course, I’m assuming I have a choice in this and Lisa wants to continue the program and wants me to be her tutor.

I’d like to continue teaching Lisa to read and watching her grow. She’s committed to the program, but not as fully committed as I would like. Each week, part of her homework includes reading at least one book at home. She’s done this once. We’ve talked about the importance of practicing at home and she agrees; she just doesn’t do it and I’m not sure why. When I ask, she shrugs her shoulders and says, “I don’t know.” If she were practicing at home, I think we’d be a lot further along than we are.

I’d also enjoy the challenge of teaching someone new. I’d like to meet a new student, learn his/her story and see what kind of progress we can make together. It’s a fresh start and I think I’ll be even better the second time around.

Actually, I think I have made up my mind. A few weeks ago, I was sharing my frustrations of Lisa’s bout with rescheduling with a friend. My friend said that I was probably the best thing that ever happened to Lisa and she was a lucky girl.  The person who said this is a new friend. We’re just getting to really know each other and I value her opinion. She has great insight and really seems to get me. She made this comment a few weeks ago and it’s really stuck with me. Whenever I think about the decision ahead, I just can’t see letting Lisa go. She’s part of my life now. I want to know how she’s doing and how she progresses. Lisa doesn’t seem to have a lot of constants in her life and if she wants me in her life, I’ll be there.

*Name changed to protect the student’s identity.

Tutoring Lisa* – Week Twelve

I arrived at Literacy Advance this morning and looked around for Lisa. She’s always early, so if I don’t see her in the lobby, I look for her in the computer lab. There she was, on the computer, getting help from one of the staff. I stuck my head in the doorway, got her attention, and told her I’d be in our classroom getting settled.

At the top of our agenda today was taking a survey, which provides information for the organization to continue grant funding. I had taken my part at home so I could concentrate on helping Lisa complete her student survey. She did a good job reading the questions, with a little help from me, but had some difficulty answering them. An early question asked if the staff was friendly and the answer choices were “yes, very”, “yes, a little” and “no.” Her answer? “I don’t know.” So, I asked, “You don’t know if they’re friendly? Are they nice to you when you’re here?” “Yes, they’re nice. They say good morning and everything, but I don’t talk to them and they don’t talk to me. I don’t want them all up in my business.” Okaaaay. She’s clearly sensitive about people asking too many questions. We’re still working on the art of conversation. She finally ended up answering “yes, very.” We plodded through the rest of the survey, and getting Lisa to answer something other than “I don’t know” or “It doesn’t matter” was like pulling teeth.

We went over her homework and she read the ten sentences that she writes for me each week. This is one of my favorite parts because this is where I learn more about her without directly asking questions! Today I learned she likes to take her kids to the park and she doesn’t like waiting in long lines at WalMart.

We concluded our class by reading a short chapter in her book about daily inspirational thoughts. It was painful watching her struggle with words that are way beyond her literacy level. I was concerned that she’d lose her enthusiasm for reading if it was such an onerous task so when we were finished I asked her if she liked reading this book or the “other” books we’d been reading more. She said she like the other books, so back to children’s books we go. She’ll get to practice her reading with books like “Go, Dog, Go” which has good repetition in it, and we’ll have some giggles while we do it.

* Name changed to protect the student’s identity.

Tutoring Lisa* – Week Eleven

Literacy Advance’s program is twelve weeks long and next week was scheduled to be our last class. Neither Lisa* nor I was ready to end our sessions, and since we haven’t been able to meet twelve times, we worked out an arrangement with the school to extend our classes for three more weeks. Although Lisa has already reached her goals, she has more to learn and is anxious to do so.

In our phonics lessons last week, we ran across the word “check”. Every time she said the word, and it was said at least a half dozen times, she followed it with the statement that she hates checks. She actually hates checks and credit cards. She hates checks because if you write a check and don’t have enough money in your bank account, you end up having to pay even more. She hates credit cards because if you miss a payment the credit card company makes you pay a late fee and raises the interest rate. These are valid reasons not to like checks or credit cards. These comments, along with others over the past weeks, led me to believe she may have difficulty handling her finances, so I offered to help her set up a budget and tracking her spending. I’ve done it for others and it’s helped them. I hope she takes me up on it.

I received a phone call last Thursday from Literacy Advance informing me Lisa couldn’t make our Monday class. I was disappointed we wouldn’t get to meet, but I was pleased she contacted the school and gave plenty of notice. I look forward to seeing her next week.

* Name changed to protect the student’s identity.

Tutoring Lisa* – Week Ten

Driving to Literacy Advance today, I was not looking forward to talking to Lisa* about last week’s incident. She was jumpy and jittery when I got there, so I knew it was on her mind as well, and we’d need to sort out our issues so we could move on and be productive.  We discussed it and agreed to stay with our Monday morning sessions.

Lisa calmed down and perked up as we moved through our agenda. She’s still struggling with phonics and I’m not sure what to do. Next week, I’ll ask the LA staff for ideas on another way of teaching phonics.

When it was time to read, Lisa pulled “Grace for the Moment: Inspirational Thoughts for Each Day of th Year” out of her backpack. I was pleased she brought an adult book. I scanned through it, the language seemed pretty basic and Lisa seemed very proud of having the book. She needed a lot more reading help from me than usual, but she made it through and I think it did wonders for her self-esteem.

* Name changed to protect the student’s identity.

Tutoring Lisa* – Week Nine

Last Friday, Lisa* mentioned she might need to reschedule our next class because of something at her daughters’ school. She said she’d let me know. I didn’t hear anything over the weekend and prepared materials for our Monday session.

On Monday morning my telephone rang at 6:20am. Roused from a sound sleep, I leaped out of bed and ran towards my ringing, vibrating phone. My experience with unexpected early calls is not good. The last time I got a call that early I was told my father was code blue.

A bright and cheery voice greeted me with “Good morning, Jennifer. I need to be at my girls’ school today. Can we meet on Wednesday instead?”

“Lisa, I would have to rearrange my whole schedule.”

“Should I call you back later?”

I was a bit taken aback. “No.” I said, “I’m not going to rearrange my schedule. If you can’t meet today, let’s skip this week and meet next Monday.”

“Oh…you don’t want to meet this week?”

“Yes, I do want to meet this week, Lisa. I wanted to meet today. If you can’t meet today, we need to skip this week.”

“What day do you want to meet next week?”

“Our regularly scheduled day is Monday. Let’s meet then.”

Now perhaps this seems a bit harsh. Let me give you more information and you’ll understand why I did this. Two weeks ago, she gave me a week’s notice that she was taking her daughters to the doctor to get their shots and couldn’t meet the following Monday. My calendar was free, the school found us a new room and it all worked out. Last week, Lisa called over the weekend to tell me she had something at her daughters’ school on Monday and asked to reschedule. Again, it worked out for me and the school.

I understand the first schedule conflict could have been a fluke. The second time, however, established a pattern, with shorter notice.

This last time I had to draw a line in the sand. Lisa was testing boundaries. We’ll be having a discussion next Monday about the importance of keeping appointments.

* Name changed to protect the student’s identity.